Lindsay Lohan Is a Sucker for a Rich Pelt

A Columbia University coed has revealed that Lindsay Lohan channeled Winona Ryder at a New York City club in January. Lohan made off with the scholar’s $11,000 blond mink coat and then, not being the brightest lush in the rehab, was photographed repeatedly wearing the garment.

Masha Markova says she attended a Stavros Niarchos party at trashy but expensive club 1 OAK on January 26. She stayed for an hour and remembers briefly sitting next to Lindsay. Masha, perhaps naive about the big city or feeling pretty confident that anyone who can actually bust past the 1 OAK doorman wouldn’t need to pilfer clothing, placed her coat in a communal bin. And it mysteriously vanished.

Cut to Masha reading OK! magazine’s Feb 11 edition and noting a photograph of Lohan leaving 1 OAK on January 26, wearing Masha’s fur! Upon some digging, Masha discovered other shots of Lohan gallivanting on the same night, but wearing an entirely shabbier coat. This story plots out like CSI, but all you need is a really dumb actress and tabloids.

Markova claims 1 OAK didn’t lift a finger until her immigration lawyer reamed out Lohan’s severely put upon attorney Blair Berk. Markova then received a cryptic phone call from 1 OAK, telling her she had something coming to her.

“They were very discreet, never mentioned a name or even the word coat,” Markova says. “They just said, ‘We’re going to bring you something.’ “

Masha received her coat, or a reasonable facsimile, two days later. It was “reeking of cigarettes and booze, with a slight tear in the lining,” she says. She had it dry-cleaned and tailored, and it’s reportedly fine. But Markova and her attorney want Lohan to pay at least 10K for the “rental fee.”

Lohan’s just like your friends who don’t get around to returning that DVD they borrowed. She has it; she’s just too busy to actually bring it to you. Except in Lindsay’s case, the DVD is an $11,000 fur, and the “borrower” has a sense of entitlement that verges on psychotic, and she uses the DVD for an ashtray and bar rag.

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