Naomi Campbell Admits She’s Looney Tunes

Raging supermodel Naomi Campbell pled guilty to six offenses in a London court yesterday stemming from the April incident in which she attacked police officers at Heathrow Airport, according to the Telegraph.

Naomi threw the April fit because one of her bags (presumably the one with her psychiatric medication) was lost. She reportedly spat on police and yelled race-based obscenities as she was escorted away.

Naomi’s lawyer Simon Nicholls said that Nay-Nay—who is working on her trust issues—was “bitterly disappointed” to be charged.

“She feels what happened was regrettable and she has come to court today to put her side of the story,” her spokesvictim Alan Edwards said before the proceedings.

In an ironic turn, the balding supermodel hid her face from cameras as she arrived in court. That kind of photoshoot doesn’t pay.


The New York Post reports that a British court has sentenced Naomi Campbell to 200 hours of community service for her Heathrow rampage.

To get jail time, the notorious spitter and hitter would have to actually kill someone, and not just anyone. Probably smashing a small child’s head against a wall until dead would earn Naomi six months in jail. Although that sentence might be shortened due to extenuating circumstances. Such as if the small child had laughed mildly while on an airplane with Naomi.