Nicole Richie on a Fast Train to Frumpy Town

After giving birth, most women would be proud to wear skimpy, body-hugging outfits, providing their slender figures had returned. But bone-thin mommy Nicole Richie goes to the opposite extreme, stepping out in public draped in giant swaths of busy cloth.

There’s an old saying in the fashion world that confusing patterns and colors can’t liven up a corpse, and they don’t do much for Nicole either.

On the right, the young mother of Harlow Madden steps out at the Women in Film Awards in a blue print, complete with a dizzying design of flowers, leaves and fringe.

On the left, at the Cartier Love Charity Bracelet event, Nic envelops herself in a yellow, green and gray satin gown resembling camouflage.

Luckily for Richie, Janet Jackson’s amazing disappearing feet always provide a good distraction. They must be sensitive to sunlight or something.

Click in to the gallery for all the Cartier red-carpet action.