The Maddens and Their Chicks Compete in Bore-Off

Zzzzzz……huh? Oh, yeah, it’s Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie with their Madden twins.

Who does boring better?

Remember the days when Richie would drive the wrong way down the highway, hopped up on goofballs and weed? And when Paris would be up dancing on banquettes, and throwing herself on anything with a penis? Well, she sometimes does it for ole’ times sake.

Since Nicole had baby Harlow and settled down with Joel Madden, and Paris followed suit with Joel’s brother Benji, it’s been like Little House on the 90210 Praire for these four.

Paris and Benji even endorse sobriety now!

Where’s the Toxic Twosome and their Not-So Simple Life?

They’ve shot down rumors of a double wedding. But that’s the sort of cheese that could jump-start them back to tabloid greatness.