Brooke Hogan, Solitary Tanner

Reality-TV travesty and potential Playboy model Brooke Hogan took a break from prison visits and lying about her family long enough to hit the beach in Miami yesterday.

Shockingly, Hulk’s full-bodied offspring was traveling solo.

Has Brooke really become so unlikeable that she can’t even find someone to sunbathe with? Not even her loyal buttock-oiler? Has the entire world abandoned Brooke Hogan?

Maybe she just wanted some solitude so she could craft her latest feminist manifesto. Make sure to watch next week’s Brooke Knows Best. She’ll explain why it would be best for women to be housed in remote huts while they’re menstruating.