Pam Anderson, Seek Help Now!

Crikey, Pam Anderson! Look at you in Sydney, Australia, pimping your new series Pam: Girl on the Loose. Your recent brush with XXX furball Ron Jeremy has damaged your appearance forever!

Why does your face look like a wallaby corpse? Why are the lines in your forehead so deep they could hide quarters? Did a dingo eat your sexy?

No wonder you’ve instituted a “no close-ups” rule in the filming of your series.

It seems that at least one Aussie lad still considers Pammy a worthy sex symbol.

Must be Australia’s whole Southern Hemisphere backwards thing: Summer is winter, water drains counter-clockwise, and Pam Anderson is still attractive. What a crazy, mixed-up country.