Aubrey O’Day’s Identity Crisis

Wow; it seems like nobody wants to be Paris Hilton these days. Probably not even Paris Hilton.

First Gossip Girl’s Blake Lively adamantly dismisses comparisons to the XXX heiress. Now Danity Kane singer and opportunistic bisexual Aubrey O’Day wants the world to know that she, too, is not Paris Hilton.

“Whenever I carry my dog around, people say, ‘Paris Hilton,’ ” O’Day complains to OK! magazine. “That’s horrible, because I absolutely love my dog and I’m nothing like that girl. Like, nobody can have a dog? I think any white girl with blond hair who carries around a dog is compared to Paris Hilton.”

Well, not quite, Aubrey; sometimes white girls with dogs get compared to a fire hydrant.  

O’Day also emphasizes that, unlike Hilton, she’s not a particularly prolific dater.

“Someone sent me a male blowup doll one time for my birthday because I was single and not getting any,” the Diddy protege continues. “So it’s still sitting at home. His name is Charles, after my stylist, because he’s got impeccable style.”

Wait; is she saying that her blow-up doll has impeccable style? Sigh; white girls with blond hair who carry around dogs can be so confusing sometimes