Mend It Like Beckham

Apparently weary of endlessly shopping for dresses, Victoria Beckham has decided to make them herself.

Women’s Wear Daily
unveils the soccer wife and notoriously bad kisser’s new dress line in its latest issue.

Sticky Vickie describes the line as being “inspired by the femininity and sophistication of the midcentury silhouette.” (Huh?)

“Structure is an important word to use when discussing my collection,” Beckham explains of her creations. “My clothes are designed for women from a woman’s perspective.”

If these dresses are designed from the perspective of the particular woman who designed them, the ticket price—which will range from $600 to $1,400 wholesale—will include the massive liposuction that the average woman will require to fit into them.

And hopefully boast designs that downplay horrifically knobby knees.