David Beckham Is Totally Sticky

Dear God; has David Beckham decided to go into competitive eating?

No; actually the part-time soccer player was at London’s Wembley Stadium on Thursday to promote the new frozen-food line from vitamin-supplement company CO3, with whom Beckham has an endorsement deal.

The line is meant to provide healthier choices in frozen-food selections, such as, um, fish sticks.

“As a dad I know how hard it is to get kids to eat the right things,” Beckham says of the new line. “I also know as a footballer how important it is to eat the right things to perform well, so I think the GO3 range is a great way to help families take some small steps to be fit and healthy at affordable prices.”

Maybe so, Dave, but those things won’t improve the horrible fish breath that repulses your wife so.

And if you chow down all those fish sticks, the phrase “Beckham bulge” is going to take on a decidedly unsexy new meaning.