Morning Frills #104: ‘The Pole Truth’ Edition

How many times have you found yourself with an urgent need to see women in their underwear on a stripper’s pole, but—curse the luck—you just can’t get to the nearest strip club?

If you’re a resident of New York City, your prayers have been answered.

The PoleRider mobile stripper agency can send strippers to your door within minutes, via a rickshaw fitted with a professional dancing pole. The merry band of striptease artistes—dubbed the Veloettes—actually pedal to their destination, before putting on a raunchy performance suitable for private parties, video shoots and church ice-cream socials.

In these days of economic stability and uncertainty, it can be hard to be thankful. But if living in a country where strippers are delivered to your door doesn’t fill your heart with gratitude, you should probably head for your nearest al-Qaeda recruiting station, because perhaps America just isn’t for you.

Thanks to PoleRider, our nation is one step closer to the utopian wonderland that the Pilgrims envisioned when they landed at Plymouth Rock.

Click through the gallery on the right for more Veloettes goodness. It’s tastier than a turkey stuffed with chocolate pudding.