Tiger Woods’ Wife Decides to Stick Around for a While. For $1,000,000.

Money can’t buy love. But it can, apparently, buy a temporary stay from divorce court.

The Chicago Sun-Times reports that Tiger Woods’ wife, Elin Nordegren—who’s probably pretty sure at this point that she’s married to a serial adulterer—has decided not to do the natural thing and toss her hubby out of their Windermere, Florida, home with a nine-iron jammed up his allegedly philandering backside.

What could possibly have inspired Nordegren to display such grace and forgiveness? If you guessed “a boatload of money and a renegotiated prenup,” go ahead and give yourself a gold star.

A source tells the paper that Nordegren has been paid “a hefty seven figure amount,” transferred directly into a bank account controlled only by her.

Oh, and she’s also successfully demanded a thorough reworking of their prenuptial agreement. Whereas in their previous arrangement, Nordegren had to remain married to Woods for 10 years—the two wed in November 2003—before possibly collecting a $20 million settlement if they split, the new deal reportedly shortens the waiting period, and increases the payout “substantially.” 

Of course, Woods could probably scrape up that kind of cash by checking his couch cushions, so we imagine that Nordegren will probably press her pinky up to her lips Dr. Evil style and up her demands to one..hundred…BILLION DOLLARS before too long.

Tags: Tiger Woods