10 Signs You May Be Married to a Serial Adulterer
Tiger Wood’s wanton philandering has led to broken hearts, a fallen hero, and, the potential ruin of a young family. Given such an unfortunate turn of events, we’d all be remiss if we didn’t turn Tiger’s marathon of extramarital boinking into a teachable moment.
For all the rightfully concerned wives out there, Celebuzz presents, “10 Signs You May Be Married to a Serial Adulterer”:
1. Your anniversay gift — one plane ticket to Europe!
2. He finally builds that backyard treehouse for the kids — out of empty condom boxes.
3. When you ask him who he’s constantly texting, he stammers out, “just some guy”.
4. Whenever you’re around, he answers all cellphone calls with, “FYI, my wife’s here….”
5. His AIM screenname: JackRabbit69.
6. Bill on his credit card from QVC for “Two-Dozen Silver Pendants”
7. You catch him leafing through a Men’s fashion magazine with a yellow highlighter pen.
8. When you catch him applying Ben Gay to his privates, he takes a sudden interest in asking about your day and how your mother is doing.
9. He’s wearing Diddy’s new cologne.
10. During lovemaking, he accidentally calls you, “Nancy”, which isn’t your name. You give him a nasty look and he sheepishly apologizes, “Sorry, Lisa”. And, Lisa’s not your name either.