Jon & Kate Gosselin's Divorce Finalized, Finally
In a fitting end to the Naughty Aughties, a major chapter in celebrity gossip has just been brought to a close. TMZ reports that former Jon & Kate Plus 8 couple Jon and Kate Gosselin's divorce was finalized by Judge Arthur Tilson this morning, leaving a nation to wonder which marital tragedy they'll obsess over next.
According to Kate's lawyer, Mark Momjian,
"Our client will continue to reside with all eight of her children in the former marital home."
The terms of the settlement also contain some bad financial news for Papa Jon, who hasn't exactly been raking in the dough to begin with anyway. TMZ adds that the Ed Hardy enthusiast has been slapped with pretty hefty child-support payments for the couple's octo-brood, and must return every last cent of the $235,000 that he siphoned on the sly from the couple's joint bank account back in October, a sum that will be deducted from his portion of the settlement.
Given the fact that Jon & Kate network TLC has effectively barred Gosselin from picking up any cash on the side with media appearances—which seems like just about the only way he's able to earn a dime these days—it sounds like Jon better brush up on his panhandling skills.
So, to sum up: Kate keeps the house and kids, Jon might—might—be able to keep whatever spare change he still has in his pockets, and neither one got to keep their dignity.
*Sniff*; a moment of silence, please...
Okay, now dry those eyes and take our poll: Do you think the Gosselins' divorce settlement was fair?