Jon Gosselin to Box Michael Lohan in the Battle of the Celebrity Dirtbags

Ladies and gentlemen, in this corner, wearing the black trunks, a man who’s universally reviled for his horrendous parenting skills!

And in this corner…well, pretty much the same thing, except in a pudgier package.

Fox News reports that former Jon & Kate Plus 8 dad Jon Gosselin is preparing to square off in the ring against his one-time buddy Michael Lohan, in a match that’s planned to take place in Philadelphia in May, once Gosselin’s contract with TLC expires.

And just to add an extra pinch of sour spice to the whole sordid affair, boxing promoter Damon Feldman—who’s rumored to have caused Gosselin’s breakup with his former girlfriend, Hailey Glassman—may be involved in the event.

The nice thing about this is, no matter whose ass gets kicked, we’ll all win.

But if they really wanted an exciting match, they’d strap a pair of gloves onto Jon’s ex, Kate Gosselin, and toss her in the ring against her former husband. It would be years before they managed to scrub all of the grease spots that used to be Jon Gosselin out of the canvas.