Sorry, Guys; Awards Season Is All About the Ladies This Year
[Ed. Note: In this final post by Jessica Rowe, the winner of our Post-Grad Guest Blogger contest. In this installment, Rowe explains why women are dominating this year’s awards season. Read on for the shocking revelations.]
As awards season charges on with the release of the Oscar nominations, I can’t help but notice that all the various academies, presses and collections of old white men gathered around tables giving out accolades are LOVING the ladies. First there were the Golden Globes, where Mo’nique and Sandra Bullock stole the show. Then came the Grammys, where Beyonce, Lady GaGa, Pink and Taylor Swift PWNED the gentlemen, harder than Justin Bieber would get pwned in a mixed martial arts competition. (T.Swift does need to work on that whole “being in key” thing. If Pink can do it upside down, she really has no excuse.)
And now with the release of the Oscar noms, there’s a great deal of hype regarding Kathryn Bigelow’s The Hurt Locker, as well as how intense the competition is in both the Best Actress and Best Supporting Actress categories. Meanwhile, the fellas…ahem, yeah. I am quite pleased to see the ladies finally getting some love and respect, and I naturally have some theories about why the sudden change:
- In the wake of the madness that is The Twilight Saga, the powers that be finally figured out that in large number women are dangerous creatures willing to kick, scream, bite and buy duvet covers with RPattz’s face permanently etched into cloth. Concerned that this could mean the destruction of humanity as we know it, they chose to appease ladies by hurling awards at them, in the vain hope that this will distract them until someone releases the Eclipse trailer.
- THE MAN, notoriously in charge of running the world and controlling the minds of the masses, is having some marital issues with Mrs. The Man. He agreed to let the ladies rule the awards-show roost (Mrs. The Man has loved Sandra Bullock since Speed, and even through Speed 2: Cruise Control), and in return, he will be allowed back in the bed. Even though he neglected to pick his dirty boxers up off the floor of their secret, high-tech, underground bunker.
- Girlz rule 4eva. Duh.
Kudos ladies, keep it up!
Jessica would like to thank Celebuzz, her mom, and all the readers for the fun times over the last seven posts.