Sandra Bullock Injured in Attempted Lady-Parts Dye-Job

It’s often been said that love hurts. For Sandra Bullock, it also burns and stings. The Speed actress and current Oscar nominee—who’s married to former Monster Garage biker Jesse James—has revealed that she attempted to gussy up her lady area for Valentine’s Day and, well, we should probably let her do the revealing, since she seems to be so good at it: 

“I decided for Valentine’s Day I would do a special hair thing. I wanted to try to create a pink heart shape with my lower hair. It was painful. You had to bleach it first. There’s something about bleach that feels like acid. Then I had to shave it. I was in so much pain, but I kept going and put the pink dye on and it went the wrong color.”

Ouch! But don’t feel too bad, Sandra; we hear the same thing happened to Larry King this year.

Next time, though, you should probably just do what all the cool show-biz kids are doing and bedazzle your va-junk. The only real danger there is possibly temporarily blinding your partner when the panties come off. Or so we’ve heard.