Turning Lemons Into Lemonade: Jennifer Aniston to Host Valentine’s Day Soiree

For all those who bet that this would be another year of Sleepless in Seattle and a pint of butter-brickle Hagen Daaz for Jennifer Aniston on February 14th — well, you’re about to lose your hard-earned cash.  According to reports, the former Mrs. Brad Pitt has a Valentine’s date this Sunday night…with a group of friends!  <cue sad music>. 

Apparently, the whole gang’s coming over to her house for Swedish meatballs and big hugs.  Of course, finding people to attend a mass gathering on the year’s most romantic couples evening is not so easy.  You need to dig a bit for folks who may not have traditional Valentine’s plans.

While the precise list remains a secret, we have surmised some likely possible names on the Aniston-St. Valentine guest list and why they might be in attendance:

Tiger Woods and Elin Nordegren

After a month in rehab, what better place to get away from sex than Jennifer Aniston’s house?

John Mayer

Let’s be honest, he’s got nowhere else to go.

Courtney Cox

Because Courtney has just signed on for another decade of being the married best-friend who consoles her single friend over failed relationships.

The Situation

Free drinks.  

Gerard Butler

Until Bounty Hunter hits the theaters, these two are inseparable lovebirds.  After opening weekends, it’s back to strictly AIM buddies.

Jessica Simpson

Mostly just to tell John Mayer to stop sexting her from Jen Aniston’s guest bathroom, though she might stay for some red velvet cake bits.

Taylor Lautner

Hiding out from ab-crazed female stalkers.


Demi Lovato

In tears, after learning that Joe Jonas’ “purity” ring means something other than that he’s 100% Jonas.


Happy Valentine’s Day!