Paulina Porizkova Calls Out Heidi Montag For Her F-List Boobs

Paulina Porizkova is a former America’s Next Top Model judge, a former model, wife of Rick Ocsek, a writer, and apparently the most insightful person on the planet Earth.

Paulina wrote an op-ed for Modelinia today lamenting Kate Hudson’s alleged boob job and the death of the smaller-breasted celebrity.

Paulina, being a natural beauty herself, takes issue with the overload of breast implants in Hollywood. Unsurprisingly, Paulina focused on plastic clown boob’d (and face’d) star Heidi Montag for much of her rage against breast implant overload.

While praising the classic and natural looks of such beauties as Audrey Hepburn, Jane Birkin, Jean Harlow, and Twiggy, Paulina is sure to cut down Heidi:

Compare any one of these natural beauties to someone like Heidi Montag, and it’s like comparing a Hastens Swedish handmade mattress to a cheap plastic pool float.

Hm, actually a cheap plastic pool float does kind of accurately describe Heidi’s new looks.

Twittering twit and breast implant connoisseur Spencer Pratt has yet to comment on the story, but we can predict almost any of his possible retorts. Will it be “Who is Paulina Porizkova?” or maybe a comment on the state Paulina’s breasts? Or maybe Spencer will pull out his favorite stock outrage response and claim on Twitter that he will give a lie detector test to prove that Heidi is not in fact an inflatable pool float? Take your pick.

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