M.I.A. Adds Conspiracy Theories to Her Hatred of Everything Popular

M.I.A. has gone through the looking glass in her ongoing campaign to trash everything that’s good and right with the world.

The “Paper Planes” singer, who recently has attacked such cherished cultural institutions as Twilight, Lady GaGa and—gasp!—even innocent, cherubic Justin Bieber, has now gone on a tirade against pretty much the entire Internet.

In the newest issue of Nylon, M.I.A. cautions readers against using Facebook and Google, because they’re really just tools of The Man:

“And you know, all governments are connected to Google, and all governments can shift their search engines so only what they want you to see comes up…I want kids to be aware of this digital circumstance…Everyone on the Internet is like, ‘Oh my God, come and join Facebook!’ They’re all so optimistic…and really, everyone is f*cking you up behind the screens. And I don’t like that. It makes it difficult for me to interact with my fans knowing that. Google and Facebook were developed by the CIA, and when you’re on there, you have to know that.”

The singer fails to detail how the Rand Corporation and revere vampires fit into the grand digital conspiracy.

Perhaps M.I.A. could show some real commitment to her cause and prevent any information about her from finding its way onto the Internet. Then everyone would be happy—and safe from tyranny!