Mariah Carey Might Be Pregnant, and Other Hilarious Celebrity Items

Just because celebrity gossip is, like, the most important thing ever doesn’t mean we can’t have a few laughs about it. Join us now as Celebuzz Guest Comedian Blogger and recurring Funny or Die comedienne Ellyn Daniels looks at the lighter side of today’s celebrity news.

Rumors are circulating that Mariah Carey might be pregnant. One has to wonder if this news provided the inspiration for Nick Cannon’s new film in development called Extra Protection. I’m just kidding. I’m sure the two are very happy if the rumors are true. Nick certainly deserves a little happiness after it was revealed on Lopez Tonight that he lost his virginity to an older woman who made him cry. Don’t worry Nick, a lot of us cry after sex.

Heidi Montag might not be leaving Spencer Pratt after all. Apparently, Heidi feels she just wouldn’t be complete without him. Friends are saying Heidi arrived at this realization after consulting with a divorce attorney and learning that Spencer would be entitled to half of their joint assets in a divorce settlement which would include her bottom lip, right cheek implant and left breast.

It looks like parents DO understand. Will and Jada Pinkett Smith’s son, Jaden, is featured rapping with Justin Bieber in their new video “Never Say Never,” the theme song for Jaden’s upcoming film, The Karate Kid. Now that Will has become the King, it appears that Jaden is the new Fresh Prince.  I guess this leaves Bieber as D.J. Jazzy Justin.