The CW’s Gossip Girl turned up the heat and brought things back to Manhattan on the second installment of its final season. So, who’s cheating with whom?
Note: Spoilers ahead if you haven’t watched Monday’s episode, “High Infidelity.”
It turns out no one actually, unless you count Bart Bass (Robert John Burke) whose faithfulness is questionable at best. Besides, the whole “Chuck (Ed Westwick) trying to reveal his father’s secret” storyline is a little tired and we’re only on Episode 2. As my friend who has missed a few episodes questioned while we were watching, “Isn’t Bart Bass supposed to be dead?” Uh yeah.
Who cares about this Amira (Andrea Gabriel) woman? I know I don’t! The only good quip Bart got in was his dig about his son attending to Blair’s errands. Ain’t no shame in your game Chuck, who in Blair Waldorf’s (Leighton Meester) life hasn’t been her bitch at some point?
Speaking of those who have once obeyed Queen B, “High Infidelity” brought the rumored return of Nelly Yuki. For those who need a refresher, Blair excommunicated Nelly when she stole Blair’s spot at Yale. Alas, the minion who used to crush on Lonely Boy is back and she’s wielding major power in the form of a WWD press badge.
It seems the tables have turned, as Blair now needs Nelly in order to make Waldorf Designs’ re-launch successful. Isn’t it hard to believe that it will take the opinion of one 21-year-old fashion reporter to tank an entire season’s collection? Then again, I don’t write about fashion for a reason. I’m barely going to address the fact that Blair’s other fashion adversary is Poppy Lifton (Tamara Feldman) of Season 2 fame, because isn’t she busy running a Ponzi scheme somewhere?
Let’s talk about some more relevant people otherwise known as Serena and Nate. It’s funny that both of them are trying so hard to prove themselves when they were once so effortlessly popular. That seems to be the theme of the final season of Gossip Girl; unless you’re Dan (Penn Badgley) and you’re on some sort of Emily Thorne path of Revenge, but we’ll get to him later.
I love that S and Nate made up. They make far better friends than enemies. Besides, Nate didn’t really wrong Serena on Season 5; he was just kind of absent and banging cougars. In perhaps what was the worst kept spoiler of Season 6, it turns out that Nate’s new lady friend is Serena’s boyfriend’s daughter. Just how old is Steven, anyway!? Also how could Nate possibly not realize how young that girl was? Nevermind, it’s Nate. How awesome was Georgina’s (Michelle Trachtenberg) line about Nate, “Why is the handsome vacant one calling me?”
Dan and Georgina hands down had the best lines of the episode, which wasn’t that surprising. Also not surprising, Georgina likes to watch Dan sleep and Dan once considered Brooklyn to be a moral high ground. Whatever, at least we didn’t have to see Rufus (Matthew Settle) and Ivy (Kaylee DeFer) getting cuddly under an afghan again. I’m twitching just thinking about it.
The saying is “hell hath no fury like a woman scorned,” but Dan Humphrey is about to turn that old adage on its head. Dan wants revenge on the UES and he wants it now. Despite meetings with a bunch of highly respectable literary establishments including Vanity Fair and New York Magazine, Dan’s refusal to change any elements of his story brought him to The Spectator. In what’s destined to be a mutually beneficial collaboration, Nate will be publishing Dan’s expose, likely pissing off all of their friends.
I really hope Dan doesn’t go too hard on Serena in this book after the way he treated her last season. He even insulted her when she was trying to get a new start on the season premiere. Let Serena have her mature relationship. I really like this new S. You can only be a hot mess for so long… right?
Now onto Gossip Girl’s Buzz Moments, because despite what Nate’s little girlfriend says, Gossip Girl isn’t just for old people!
OMG!: Serena having Blair removed from her party by security. This show has done many things, but there has never been a Serena/Blair standoff this serious!
Thank you, TV gods.: All of the humorous exchanges between Dan and Georgina. Of course, she watches you sleep Humphrey!
Awk-ward: Bart claiming that he knows how important family is to Lily. Awww, hey Lil, where’s that kid you gave up for adoption? We haven’t acknowledged him in a few seasons.
Hotness: Nate Archibald morning sex, complete with shirtless shot and bedhead.
Fab-u-lous: All the Season 1 fashion throwbacks we spotted at Eleanor Waldorf Designs; As well as the portraits of S and B from 1×4.
Can. Not. Wait.: S and B smack down/reunion to begin.
Celebuzz meter (1-10): 8. Slowly but surely we’re getting back to a good place.
How do you feel about Serena and Nate making up? Tell us in the comments section below.
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