‘American Horror Story: Asylum’ Recap: 5 WTF Moments From ‘Nor’easter’

'AHS' Asylum Recap
Read 5 WTF moments from the Season2 premiere.
For some viewers, Wednesday’s American Horror Story: Asylum probably struck a little too close for home.

During the episode, a terrifying storm barreled through the East Coast, hitting Briarcliff asylum — and its patients — particularly hard. Is it just me or is Ryan Murphy starting to have a sixth sense when it comes real-life events?

First, Glee featured both Whitney Houston’s “I Will Always Love You” and Andy Williams’ “Moon River” the week after the perspective artists’ deaths, and now Asylum hosts a scary superstorm just days after Sandy ravaged the East Coast.

But I digress, despite the uncanny story line, American Horror Story: Asylum just keeps getting better. For the third week in a row, Sister Jude (Jessica Lange) and her island of misfit toys have kept me biting my nails in anticipation. Between the Bloody Face debacle, Raspers and Shelley’s ill-fated escape, “Nor’easter” had plenty of WTF moments.

Note: Spoilers if you haven’t watched Wednesday’s episode, “Nor’easter.”

1. Sister Mary Eunice (a.k.a Satan) kills in cold blood. Now that Sister Mary (Lily Rabe) has been possessed by Satan, she’s a heck of a lot more fun. She also happens to be stirring up quite a bit of trouble at Briarcliff.  Not only does she drive Sister Jude into a drunken stupor, but she also tries to seduce Dr. Arden, which ultimately drives McCreepy into a libido-driven sex rage. But his target isn’t that “dirty little slut” Sister Mary.

However, Sister Satan’s biggest offense thus far is gruesomely killing a Devil-fearing patient. R.I.P. “The Mexican.” Seriously, that was an intense scene. Even Dexter doesn’t get that graphic. Sister Satan then takes the body to the hungry Raspers.

Is anyone in Briarcliff safe from Satan? Probably not, but I’d prefer if Zachary Quinto goes unharmed for at least the next three or four episodes.

2. Sister Jude’s past comes back to haunt her. Sister Satan has it in for Sister Jude.

We know Sister Jude turned to the cloth after killing an innocent girl in a hit-and-run accident in 1949, but now Sister Satan is using that information to terrorize her superior.

Sister Jude becomes paranoid when she thinks someone in Briarcliff knows her dirty little secret. She even starts to hallucinate  the little girl in the blue coat! So Sister Satan makes her believe it’s Dr. Arden (James Cromwell), and with a little help from “the blood of Christ,” Sister Jude is wasted in no time. And with her defenses down, she almost lets her secret slip to everyone in Briarcliff. Oy, something tells me Penny is smarter than we give her credit for.

Jessica Lange can do no wrong. She deserves all of the Emmys after her stellar performance. Even in a drunken stupor, Lange is the most captivating actor on screen.

3. Leo and Teresa are finally dead… and so is Bloody Face? Well, one Bloody Face. It seems the Bloody Face who terrorized Leo (Adam Levine) and Teresa (Jenna Dewan -Tatum) is not exactly the same Bloody Face who terrorized women in 1964 Massachusetts. In reality, he’s just a copy cat killer — and he’s not alone.

After Leo makes a miraculous recovery (seriously, WTF?), he saves his new wife, stabs Bloody Face to death and almost makes it out of Briarcliff Manor. That is, until he and Teresa are shot dead by two other Bloody Faces. Didn’t see that one coming.

But that’s not all! Just when you think these two kids are mere copy cat killers looking to have some deadly fun with tourists, another — yes, another — Bloody Face enters the picture, and he doesn’t look too happy. If you’ve been keeping count, that’s four Bloody Faces: one dead, two soon-to-be-dead and one enigma. Is this Bloody Face the real Bloody Face? Or is he just another copy cat? Or could this be just a scene from a movie (a la Urban Legend)?

4. Dr. Arden digs deeper — literally! — into Kit. The alien story line is perhaps the most perplexing part of Asylum. Are they just a figment of Kit’s (Evan Peters) imagination? If so, where did the six-legged micro chip come from?

Dr. Arden is on a mission to find out. Of course, this involves a little digging — into Kit’s neck. Will McCreepy find another chip hidden inside Kit? I have absolutely no idea. With so much going on (Bloody Face, Satan, Raspers…), it’s easy to forget about Kit’s extraterrestrial sightings, but I can’t help but be intrigued by the thought of Murphy adding E.T. into the mix.

Plus, was it just me or did anyone else spot an alien in the hallway when Sister Jude drunkenly stumbles around? Or was it Bloody Face? Or another Rasper? Guys, all of these creatures look the same!

Sadly, Kit isn’t McCreepy’s only victim.

5. THE RASPERS ARE IN THE BUILDING. And Shelley might be one of them. Lana, Kit, Grace and Shelley hatch up a plan to escape from Briarcliff while the nor’easter terrorizes the East Coast. Sounds like a good idea, right? Almost.

Shelley distracts the guard with a BJ, while Kit, Grace (Lizzie Brocheré) and Lana (Sarah Paulson)  head for Briarcliff’s secret passageway. Unfortunately, Shelley gets stopped by a sex-crazed Dr. Arden, so the three decide to bust out of the asylum without her. Bad idea! Once they reach Briarcliff’s forest, they meet the Raspers — and they are some scary-looking creatures.

The Briarcliff patients-turned-savages are heavily mutated as a result of McCreepy’s scientific experiments — and they eat (ick) anyone who enters the forest. Kit, Grace and Lana run back into Briarcliff… WITHOUT SHUTTING THE DOOR. So, of course, now the Raspers could have potentially invaded Briarcliff.

And it looks like poor Shelley could soon be joining them. After Dr. Arden’s failed attempt to rape Shelley, he clubs her over the head and subsequently hacks off her legs. Ugh, poor Shelley will never get to run away to Paris now. Since everyone believes she escaped Briarcliff, Arden has the perfect excuse for her disappearance.

Sooner or later, she’ll be another one of Arden’s Raspers.

Buzz Moments:

OMG!: When Dr. Arden removed the sheet away from Shelley to reveal her amputated legs… OMG! That was almost as bad as Arizona’s big reveal on Grey’s Anatomy.

Awk-ward: Sister Satan’s advances on Dr. Arden are both creepy and misguided. I mean, save that kind of kinky behavior for Monsignor Howard (Joseph Fiennes), Sister!

Hotness: Sister Satan is so much more fun to watch than Sister Mary Wet Blanket. I know she’s supposed to be evil and all, but I like that she’s now the driving force of all of Asylum’s action. Plus, who doesn’t love a nun in red lipstick?

Fab-u-lous: She may not be on screen for very long, but Pepper (Naomi Grossman) is a scene stealer. And she definitely knows more than we thing she does.

Can. Not. Wait.: To find out more about Bloody Face. Was he one of Dr. Arden’s Raspers? And therefore, can he not age? Perhaps the Bloody Face in 2012 is, in fact, the real Bloody Face from 1964. And what about the aliens? I need to find out E.T. fits into all of this madness ASAP. is most definitely a scene stealer

Celebuzz Meter (1-10): 9 — Now this was a Halloween episode!

American Horror Story: Asylum airs Wednesdays at 10 PM  on FX.

Watch all of our interviews from the American Horror Story: Asylum premiere below.

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