Sheryl Crow, Paula Abdul, Kim Cattrall & More: Why Hollywood's 'SWOFTY' Generation Are Happier Staying Single Than Getting Hitched (EXCLUSIVE GUEST BLOG)

SWOFTY: SINGLE WOMEN OVER FIFTY
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Writing exclusively for Celebuzz, Wendy Walsh, Ph.D. — an expert for DatingAdvice.com author of the forthcoming The 30-Day Love Detox – explains why so many celebrity "cougars" are happier staying single than tying the knot:

Well, here’s the thing about human bonding. It evolved in us so that two people with complimentary skill sets (protector provider, gatherer, nurturer) could get a tiny little infant safely out of the womb and in arms for about three years. We are the only species born so premature. Most animal babies are up on four legs and running with the pack within hours.

Our species is unique for another reason, too. We have menopause. Yep, only humans and orca whales have an able bodied group of women who, for one-third of their lives, are energetic, wise, ambitious, loving.... and sterile. Anthropologists speculate that it takes not just two people to raise a child, but an all-important grandmother as well.

When I hear about celebrity women who have vowed not to see the alter again in their lives, I think they may be honoring their biological predisposition. Even if they don’t have grandchildren, older women often get busy raising the culture. They are past the window to be looking for a man to make a baby-nest and are financially secure and enjoying their lives.

They may have committed, long-term love relationships because it feels good, but an old fashioned marriage? That’s for a young woman who wants to marry her assets with a peer and build a life together. But when the life has already been built and comes with houses, kids, grandkids, and payments to ex’s.... well, let’s just say that marriage over fifty gets mighty complicated.

Without pointing fingers to any of the women mentioned in this article, there could also be attachment difficulties in their psychological make-up. I mean, we forgive a beautiful star when she has three marriages and countless boyfriends because we assume the Hollywood culture brings much opportunity and too much permissiveness.

That’s certainly true. But what if that woman lived in a small town? Her friends might stage an intervention and a therapist might discover some major attachment injuries.

My advice to those fabulous women facing the miracle of menopause? Enjoy your life. Keep up the nurturing. Our culture needs your wisdom.

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