She Came in Like a Wrecking Ball: The Wildest Moments from Miley Cyrus' 'Rolling Stone' Profile

Miley Cyrus on Rolling Stone
The latest curve in this roller coaster we call Miley Cyrus Takes America comes from Rolling Stone, who stuck the reb'l fleur du jour on its cover, all topless and tongue hangin' out. The gonzo interview strives to get wild and weird: she eats a taco (that's also a hamburger?)! She gets a weird tattoo! They survive a plane crash (sort of)!  At one point "a bummed-looking Oompa-Loompa, who is attached to a cable via a hook on the back of his overalls, gets hoisted up to the ceiling and dropped down to a table of girls, where he delivers a bottle of liquor" is a sentence that is written and then printed.

Our scene begins where any feral child star's profile does: "[i]n the backroom of a tattoo parlor on North La Brea Avenue in L.A."

Miley Cyrus gets the words "ROLLING" and "$TONE" tattooed on the bottoms of her feet.

For her first Rolling Stone cover story, Miley wanted to do something fun. "I thought about going to play laser tag," she says. "But laser tag sucks. And we could have gone bowling, but what are we, 90?" Naturally, the next idea was getting a tattoo.
Miley Cyrus's neighbors include Diddy's baby mama, Steve Carell, and the ghosts of some flappers maybe.
Sometimes I'd walk by and see all these people in there dressed up like old-time flappers. I was like, "Is this real – or are you guys all ghosts?"
Miley Cyrus is just as anxious about how Breaking Bad is going to end as you.
Like, I was watching Breaking Bad the other day, and they were cooking meth. I could literally cook meth because of that show. It's a how-to.
Miley Cyrus' job as a kid was the clear the bras and underwear off the stage after her father's concerts.
I'd get a really big one and be like, "Dad! I found your biggest fan!"
Robert DeNiro's Taxi Driver character is one of Miley Cyrus' fashion icons.
I bought a pair of Doc Martens. I shaved my head. Driving a fucking Ford Explorer around. Just blending in.
This is all only in preparation for the story's big outing, wherein Cyrus takes her assistant and Josh Eells, the story's writer, skydiving. All three survive and reward themselves by going to what Cyrus' assistant calls "a Mexican White Castle." Cyrus orders a taco burger, the physics of which are never explained. That night, the crew heads to a nightclub which literally features strippers of the male and female variety, a "miniature Psy" and a six-foot-seven burlesque dancer who was featured in Cyrus' VMAs performance. This is also where the aforementioned Oompa Loompa comes into play.

That Cyrus' increasingly bad behavior correlates with her first number one song is no coincidence. In an era where people are brands and brands are people, Cyrus is a marketing mastermind.

You can read the full profile here.

 

Discuss

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  • crystaljoythompson
    crystaljoythompson

    YOU PEOPLE ARE THE WORST. Just because a woman does something provocative DOES NOT MAKE HER A SLUT. There is nothing "wrong" with being "slutty". Criticizing women about their behavior just because YOU don't like it is slut-shaming. This happens when a person publicly or privately insults a woman because she expressed her sexuality in a way that does not conform with patriarchal expectations for women. THAT IS WHAT YOU ARE DOING. Karen, if you don't want your children to see it, they won't. If it's THIS important to you, you'd block the MTV channel on your tv. I'm an adult and I believe that THERE IS A HUGE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN WHAT SHE DID AND PORN. I bet you're one of those people who would ask "what a girl was wearing" or "if she'd been drinking" after hearing a rape took place. You need to open your mind up and realize that you've created whatever hell you're trying to avoid within yourself and you will carry it with you for as long as your hate is deep.

  • loveiansomerhalder
    loveiansomerhalder

    Miley has lost a lot of weight and messed up her hair

  • loveiansomerhalder
    loveiansomerhalder

    You need help Miley. u need too go too rehab and get off drugs.

  • loveiansomerhalder
    loveiansomerhalder

    Miley are you trying too be a slut! Ur hair looks awful! Are u trying out for playboy? LOL. U sure would not make center fold. Sinse u messed up ur looks. U are out of control to! What happened too the old Miley? The old Miley was so kool! But the new Miley not kool! Grow up! the way u are acting makes u look like trash and like a slut!

  • karen59
    karen59

    There comes a time when behavior such as this needs to stop being so easyily viewed by children.She has proven she's trash and will just keep being trashier. I could care less about how she gets to hell but I have children who not only see her trash on FB but just as vulgar are the comments made to and at her of which mainly are sexually related. All I hear is about her right to be a adult which also is sad children feel because your an adult this is ok. She needs to at least be only viewed as the adult she wants to be known as on the adult channels. After all other porn stars are there but she doesn't feel like if it were adults watching her she would get quiet the attention

  • Marie Dominguez
    Marie Dominguez

    I will say that I am enjoying This Miley better haha I just didn't like the pasty outfit other than that do your thing

  • Marie Dominguez
    Marie Dominguez

    Come on I love your body but please stop wearing such ugly outfits! U can rock anything dosent mean u should wear the trashiest thing u can find or have made

 
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