Charlie Sheen Falls for ‘Satire’ News Story, Pens Strange Apology Poem to Rob Ford

By: Robert Kessler / November 14, 2013

The Daily Currant is a satire news site so bad that the only time anyone ever talks about it is when people mistake it for a real news site, due to its remarkably low profile. This happened once again yesterday when the site published a story with the headline, “Charlie Sheen Calls for Rob Ford’s Resignation.” The joke being that it would be hypocritical for Charlie Sheen to criticize Toronto’s mayor who recently admit to having used crack cocaine while in office.

Apparently even Charlie Sheen himself was confused by the story, and today posted a poem apologizing to Ford on Twitter.

dear Mayor Rob Ford,
the only truth or correct reporting in today’s
repulsive story regarding
my alleged comments about you,
is the accurate spelling of your great
city.
your personal life is and never would be,
any of my business.
I’m sorry for any grief this may have caused.
if I can be of any assistance
in any capacity in this
media cesspool,
please accept the noble offer of my steady
hand and compassionate heart.
respectfully,
charlie sheen.

Surely Ford is pleased to count 9/11 truther and Kids’ Choice Award nominee Charlie Sheen among his supporters.