6 Tracks That Should’ve Been on Robin Thicke’s ‘Paula’ Album

Robin's Love Advice
Robin Thicke gives love advice after split.
As you’ve probably heard, Robin Thicke’s upcoming album is named Paula as an ode to his estranged wife. Well, the “Blurred Lines” singer has recently released its track list and, unfortunately, the titles are just quite disappointing and lackluster if these songs are indeed his last ditch attempt to get his lost love’s attention.

So, to help Mr. Thicke along his quest to win back Paula Patton, here are some ditties that reflects what happened between them might actually sway his ex into falling in love with him all over again.

1. “Sorry for Grabbing That Chick’s Ass”

Remember when Robin was caught grabbing a little hot young thing’s booty backstage at the MTV Video Music Awards? Maybe apologizing for getting handsy with someone who isn’t your wife is the first step to mending your broken marriage. Just a thought.

Suggested lyrics: “Ooh baby, I didn’t mean to put my hand there / And certainly didn’t mean to make it look like I was reaching for her underwear / I think there was a height disproportion and I thought it was her waist”

Lana Scolaro Robin Thicke butt grab
Socialite Lana Scolaro with Robin Thicke. [Instagram]

2. “Totally Not Desperate”

As if the opus that is Paula hasn’t tipped you off yet, Robin really wants to get his girl back — so much so that the singer has been professing his love for the actress at every moment he gets. Including a song like this on his album will definitely get the message across that Robin is dedicated in making his marriage work (and totally not desperate and hung up on the past).

Suggested lyrics: “Desperate times call for desperate measures / But I’m not desperate because you’re my treasure”

3. “Time of My Life”

Instead of “Time of Your Life,” a song actually featured on Paula, Robin should really take advantage of the nostalgia factor and cover “Time of My Life” from the Dirty Dancing soundtrack. I mean, the dude clearly likes the cheese factor. Who else would serenade someone with Stevie Wonder’s “Jungle Fever” while dancing at an underage nightclub? ROBIN THICKE, THAT’S WHO.

Suggested lyrics: Just look it up on Google.

4.  “Get Her Back” Remix

Robin has already confirmed that “Get Her Back” is indeed about Paula. Why not drive that home with a remix bonus track?

Suggested Actual lyrics: “I got get her, go back to her / I gotta treat her right / I gotta cherish her for life”

5. “Miley Cyrus Ain’t Got Nothing On You”

Infidelity rumors first sparked when the whole world watched America’s favorite twerker get uncomfortably close to Robin on live TV. Quash that gossip by telling your ladylove that her booty-popping skills are second to none.

Suggested lyrics: “There are no blurred lines about it / It was only a performance / Even you admitted that you liked it

6. “Is Blurred Lines About Rape? Here’s My Answer”

Let’s put this controversy to an end once and for all.

Suggested lyrics: “The world needs an explanation and here it is”

For the actual “Paula” track listing, head on over to our friends at Idolator