Jennifer Lawrence Wishes She Had a Xanax, Calls ‘The Hunger Games’ a ‘Huge F*cking Failure’

Still Together
FYI J-Law and Chris Martin never actually broke up
You’d think by now Jennifer Lawrence would have her own stand-up comedy show, in addition to every award under the sun (an Academy Award, Golden Globe, BAFTA, etc.) and a Billboard Top 100 song.

But nah, probably because Jennifer dislikes giving speeches and being in the limelight period. America’s favorite actress instead saves her best jokes for moments like last night’s Producers Guild of America Awards (Jan. 24, 2015), in which she was on stage to present the Milestone Award to Jon Feltheimer.

First, she opened saying she wished she had taken a Xanax before hitting the stage.

The 24-year-old then hilariously explained her anxiety, saying “I normally say no to this kind of thing on the account of my crippling anxiety and the unbreakable bond between woman and couch.” We totally feel you, girl.

She continued, “But I when I heard it was for Feltheimer, I had to say yes because I just assumed that I was contractually obligated but then when I found out that I wasn’t, I had already picked out this dress.”

Then warning Feltheimer, she said “I know what you’re thinking, I’m going to totally mess this up—and you’re right.”

Lawrence then joked about her box-office breaking movie franchise The Hunger Games, remarking

“Jon was charged to insure that Suzanne Collins’ Hunger Games incredible trilogy of books was respectfully brought to life in four films and it was a…large fucking failure!” she joked.

LOL because The Hunger Games was anything but a failure!

“I was so afraid of signing on to these movies a few years ago because something that size can make or break a career,” Lawrence said. “I put my trust in Lionsgate and they put their trust in me and now I think we have a strong and amazing relationship that I hope lasts until my career dies at 35.”

But let’s be honest: J-Law’s career dying when she’s 35-years-old is the real joke here. And if it does, then at least Lawrence can rest easy knowing she’s got a knack for stand-up comedy.

Check out the gallery to see Jennifer’s stunning white Prada gown!