A ‘Clueless’ Glossary: the 2015 Edition (in GIFs)
Ready to feel old? Clueless turns 20 on Sunday.
Yes, our favorite 90s movie featuring the most fashionable Cher Horowitz and her gang of wealthy Beverly Hills High School friends has officially surpassed its teenage years.
Clueless – which opened in theaters on July 19, 1995 – was the movie of the era, bringing some serious style inspiration, a forever crush on Paul Rudd, the desire to be besties with Alicia Silverstone and a whole new glossary filled with new phrases to shout amongst our friends… As if!
And speaking of all those phrases, we can’t help but wonder: if the movie was remade today, how would they change to keep hip with the youths of this new generation? Thus, we’re breaking down the Clueless glossary and transforming it into a 2015 edition. Enjoy:
1. As If: Cher’s way of saying “no way.”
Context: “Ugh, as if!” (After a creepy guy puts his arm around her).
2015 Edition: I seriously can’t.
2. Baldwin: a handsome man (because the Baldwin brothers were really hot in the 90s).
Context: “Okay, okay. So he is kind of a Baldwin.”
2015 Edition: BAE.
3. Barney: a stupid or inadequate male.
Context: “I don’t know where she meets these Barneys!” – Cher, referencing Tai’s friends at the mall.
2015 Edition: Fuckboy.
4. Betty: a beautiful woman (derived from the 1930s film star Betty Grable, the first pin-up girl).
Context: “Wasn’t my mom a Betty?” – Cher, showing off a portrait of her mom.
2015 Edition: MILF.
5. Boinkfest: a satisfying sexual encounter.
Context: “Here’s the 411 on Mr. Hall: he’s single, he’s 47, and he earns minor ducats for a thankless job. What the man needs is a good, healthy boinkfest.”
2015 Edition: A good bang/fuck.
6. Buggin’: totally freaking out.
Context: “It said RSVP because it was a sit-down dinner. But people came that, like, did not RSVP, so I was, like, totally buggin’.”
2015 Edition: Dying, #DEAD.
7. Generic: average.
Context: “Could they please be more generic?” – Cher talking about Tai and her friends at the mall.
2015 Edition: Basic.
8. Hagsville: ugly or disgusting.
Context: Cher asks, “Christian, what do you think of Amber?” Christian responds, “Hagsville.”
2015 Edition: Swiping left.
9. In on the Heavy Clambakes: being popular and high up on the social scene.
Context: “I’m new but I heard you had an in on the heavy clambakes.” – when Christian meets Cher.
2015 Edition: #Blessed.
10. Jeepin’: sneaking around, cheating (specifically in a car/jeep) or ignoring your significant other.
Context: “Where you been all weekend? What’s up? You been jeepin’ around behind my back?” – Murray to Dee.
2015 Edition: Ghosting.
11. Monet: someone who looks good from a distance but not up close.
Context: “She’s a full-on Monet. It’s like a painting, see? From far away, it’s okay, but up close, it’s a big ol’ mess.”
2015 Edition: She uses at least three filters.
12. Outty: leaving our exiting a conversation or place.
Context: “Im outty!”
2015 Edition: Bye, Felicia!
13. Surfing the Crimson Wave: menstruating.
Context: “I was surfing the crimson wave. I had to haul ass to the ladies’.” – Cher
2015 Edition: Shark Week.
And there you have it! Now that you have all the terminology down, don’t forget to celebrate the Clueless 20th anniversary on Sunday by putting on your best plaid ensemble with a good pair of platforms and hitting the mall with your besties. Outty!