Jane Birkin Wants Her Name Off of Hermès’ Birkin Bag, So Here Are 18 New Names to Consider

Khloé Kardashian's custom Birkin Bag is krazy.

Legendary French actress/model/musician Jane Birkin has asked Hermès, the makers of the Birkin Bag, to remove her name from their iconic(ally expensive) status piece.

Birkin apparently watched a PETA exposé about a Texas farm that harvests crocodiles for use in the making of the bags, some of which cost more than $150,000. Citing animal cruelty, Birkin is requesting that her name not be associated with the bag until Hermès implements more ethical production practices. Here is her statement:

Having been alerted to the cruel practices endured by crocodiles during their slaughter for the production of Hermès bags carrying my name, I have asked Hermès Group to rename the Birkin until better practices responding to international norms can be implemented for the production of this bag.

For their part, Hermés says they have launched an investigation and are looking into the Texas farm in question.

While it remains unclear what will come of the investigation or Birkin’s request, we have taken the liberty of coming up with some potential new names for the bag should Hermés decide to change it. Please consider…


And our favorite (and most appropriate, really):