Demi Lovato is getting real about her dark past.
The “Sorry Not Sorry” singer opened up about her struggles with depression during her latest interview with Dr. Phil, revealing she started to contemplate suicide as a young child.
“The very first time that I was suicidal was when I was seven, and I had this fascination with death,” Demi, 25, shared. “I have experienced things that I’ve not talked about and that I don’t know if I ever will talk about. But at seven, I knew that if I were to take my own life that the pain would end.”
According to the former Disney Channel star, things got much worse when she started to get bullied at school. Though she initially had a few classmates she could turn to, Demi said she was abandoned when a “suicide petition” encouraging her to kill herself had started circulating around class.
“The thing that really hurt me is that friends turned on me. It was over petty drama that 12-year-olds have in the 7th grade,” she remembered. “The reaction was so much more extreme than what was normal, they had a suicide petition and they passed it around the school and got people to sign it. I was cyberbullied and they made fun of my weight.”
Left alone while trying to cope with her bipolar disorder, Demi admitted turned to drugs and alcohol and started harming herself as an escape from her suicidal thoughts.
“It came back when I was bullied. It came back several times when I as struggling with depression—my bipolar disorder,” she said. “I turned to cutting and there was a while there when my mom was afraid to wake me up in the mornings, because she didn’t know if she opened the door, if I would be alive or not, because every time I cut it got deeper and deeper.”
“My addiction with drugs and alcohol was very severe to where I had several scares, and I knew that at the rate I was using and drinking, I wasn’t going to live a long life. I used very fast, very hard,” she continued.
As fans know, Demi checked into rehab for an eating disorder and issues with self-harm in 2010 after punching a back-up dancer while on tour with the Jonas Brothers. The songstress since started living a sober lifestyle, becoming an advocate for mental health and encouraging those in need to seek help.
“Reach out to people. Don’t hold it inside—don’t isolate. Reach out to people, whether it’s close friends, family,” she advised. “If you feel like you don’t have anybody, look within yourself and try to find that resilience that will ultimately get you through whatever it is you’re going through. Every single person on this planet is worth life.”
If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).