the-biz

Heidi Montag: You'll Wish You Were Born Without Ears

by Michael P on Jun. 24, 2008 09:18 AM / 10 Comments

Slap in the face to popular music Heidi Montag has a new single: "Fashion." It defies belief. It sounds like it was recorded in one of those booths at the boardwalk where drunken sailors make their own kareoke videos with passing hookers.

From the opening screech of "hey!", every attempt at recording-studio sweetening bounces off this girl like subtlety bounces off her boyfriend Spencer Pratt.

There's also something very wrong with this pinhead singing about high-end fashion labels when she dresses like this.

You can listen to this travesty here. You've been warned

The Hills are alive, with the sound of a bloodcurdling hyena yelp masquerading as pop music.

Quotables /

“Yay! She knows her name! And a word! It's fashion! Heidi Montag's new single entitled "Fashion" sounds like what would happen if Special Needs Barbie
were magically granted the ability to talk. After listening to this,
I'm now convinced that the poor thing can't actually read.”

Socialite Life

“Heidi Montag is trying to let us all know that she is actually talented at something other than being a life-sized Barbie impersonator. However, thus far it seems she is failing miserably. Every time I hear that Heidi has a new song out, is debuting a fashion line, or is making a cameo in a movie, I just cringe. Just when you think it couldn't get worse with talentless people invading our televisions and computers, it does! I thought you couldn't get any worse than Paris Hilton, but I was wrong. Heidi is what would happen if they put Paris in a machine and turned the annoying level up to 90, then shook it up for a few hours.

Anyway, Heidi has a new single out and it's called "Fashion". It should be called "I Really Just Need to Go Away Already." Because she can't carry a tune in a bucket, all her vocals are enhanced. Just like her boobs. And the rest of her.

I digress...I must have a real mean streak in me today! Anyway, if you want to listen to this crappy song, go here. I'm hoping the only reason you'd want to listen would be for the "It's so bad it's good" aspect.”

Gabby Babble

“The Hills couple Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt (not pictured) attend the morning Sunday service at "In His Presence" at the Church in Woodland Hills, Calif.

Speidi carried around prayer books to and from the church, one of which was "The Serenity Prayer". You know Heidi was praying for her ex-BFF Lauren Conrad!”

Just Jared

Tell Us / Should Heidi pursue a career in music?

Next Story / The Man Keeps Boy George Down

Also In The-biz /

Comments / 1-10 of 10

Sort Oldest First

lisatee 1 yr 5 mos ago
Reply

ugh. she needs to get hit by a bus.
cameronkitty 1 yr 5 mos ago
Reply

Give me the last minute of my life back.. Damnit. She should pay US
gossipguy 1 yr 5 mos ago
Reply

the lack of video makes up for it A LOT
katie999 1 yr 5 mos ago
Reply

seriously?
kkblumush 1 yr 5 mos ago
Reply

god that is such an amazing song. she is so beautiful and talented and smart.
hwoodgrrl 1 yr 5 mos ago
Reply

BEST. SONG. EVER!!!!!!!!!
rforrumor 1 yr 5 mos ago
Reply

damn.. if only i were as talented as heidi montag. i'm so jealous.
notobsessed 1 yr 5 mos ago
Reply

rforrumor said:
damn.. if only i were as talented as heidi montag. i'm so jealous.

Touche, darling!
ballier88 1 yr 5 mos ago
Reply

she should do a song with soulja boy
tracimac 1 yr 5 mos ago
Reply

Seriously. Where can I buy a copy of this fabulous album? And when is Spencer's "New Jay-Z" going to have a release? He's got a real eye for talent!

I'm keeping my fingers crossed that she will be performing this song at the MTV VMAs. It will be like Britney last year... but even more fantastic!