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Michael Lohan Reaches Out and Annoys Someone

by celebuzz on Jul. 2, 2008 06:31 AM / 4 Comments
Michael Lohan Reaches Out and Annoys Someone
Bauer Griffin Online

Michael Lohan is a prince among men.

The "Christian counselor" and patriarch of show biz's most dysfunctional family recently admitted he may have fathered an illegitimate daughter, but such trifling concerns haven't stopped him from leaving whiny voicemails for eldest daughter Lindsay.

Us magazine has published a message that Papa Lohan left for LiLo, pleading forgiveness for blabbing to the media about her personal life.

"I know that you were annoyed that I gave an interview and my need to comment about the people you are around," Mouthy Mike blubbers. "And I promise you, I absolutely promise you, I will not mention your name in the press, at all, ever again."

Of course, just because Pa Lohan pimped out Linds' personal life to the tabloids and made it known he doesn't care if he sees her again, doesn't make the whole thing his fault.

"One of the reasons why I got so concerned is because we used to talk all the time," Pops reasons on the phone. "And then you weren't returning phone calls, so I was concerned."

Awesome line of reasoning: Your kid stops taking your calls, so you reconnect with her by spilling dirt to the media.

C'mon, Mike. Even your new buddy Jesus has your number blocked on his cell phone.

Quotables /
“Imagine you're Lindsay Lohan and you pick up the phone and you hear a voicemail from your father in April, assuring you that he's done talking to the press in between hollow repetitions of the phrase "I love you."

Gawker got a hold of a phone message left for Lindsay by her born-again dad that was left on her cell back in April. Michael pleads with her to call him and tries to explain his rationale behind spilling his guts to the press every five minutes. He pleads with Lindsay:

"Look, I love you honey. Please, please don't do this anymore. Pick up the phone and talk to me. Everything from now on is between you and me. And I promise you, I will not go back on it, I will not break my word...

I promise you, I'll keep questions out of the press, when it comes to you I promise. Just please, please, honey, call me or pick up the phone. You need to promise me."


And then, of course, he picked up his blogging job with OK! Magazine. No wonder she's a hot mess. This ass actually makes Dina Lohan look relatively harmless. And that is a feat and a half.”
Socialite Life
“Word broke that Michael Lohan may have an illegitimate love child floating about. Ashley Kaufmann (above) might be the 13-year-old half-sister of Lindsay Lohan. Ashley's mother Kristi talked to OK! Magazine about the circumstances revolving around Ashley and her apparent Lohan ties. Obviously, this Kristi woman is a terrible parent…”
The Superficial
Tell Us / Does Papa Lohan really have an illegitimate daughter?
Does Papa Lohan really have an illegitimate daughter?
Posted 1 yr 4 mos ago / 12 responses
Next Story / Unlike a Virgin: Madonna's Top 10 Famous Flames

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