Oprah Winfrey Retirement Countown: Only 658 Days Left!

Nov 20, 2009 at 4:46pm

Earlier today, Oprah Winfrey announced that her eponymous television show would halt production at the completion of its 25th season on television on September 10, 2011. It might be September 9, 2011, actually; I’d fact-check it right now, except that I still have over 650 days to do so.

And that’s the point.

Who announces they’re ending their run almost two years in advance? Sometimes, royalty will make such advanced-notice announcements as to their future line of succession. Keeps the nation stable over centuries of rule. I suppose we know now that on the first Tuesday in November, 2012, Obama may or may not still have a job. But outside of monarchs and Presidents, who gives 650-day notice on their job?

Oprah does.

And what’s certain to follow over this extended, drawn out, multiyear retirement parade is the longest goodbye in the history of goodbyes. Will there be time for tears? You betcha.  Time for at least umpteen “Best Of…” shows? Absolutely. Heck, Oprah could lose weight, gain weight, do a show on seesaw weight loss, lose weight, gain weight, become bulimic, lose the weight and more, start numerous “Is Oprah Starving Herself to Death?” rumor mills, and still get fat again, all in the time she has left before she exits the stage for the final time.

The Bible states that the world was created in six days. Certain religious scholars assert that this is more of symbolic figure than a technical count of time.  Still, no way it took longer than 650 days.

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