Poor Farrah, Hugh is not your stupid daddy. He will not blindly follow your orders! No, he won't babysit Sofia while you do your naked photoshoot, (per your demands on your list) No, Mr. Hefner will not let you call him mean names-even if he financed your earlier adventures before and during Teen Mom. Actually, the very idea of seeing you naked, with that horseface you desperately tried to "improve", and with your 8 year old boy body with tits, is just too freaky for his magazine. Imagine the outrage! Imagine the mobs burning millions of copies of Playboy in a giant heap at night! Sorry Farrtah, only that sucka eunuch daddy of yours wants to see you naked. The rest of the human population on our planet has enough suffering to be subjected to seeing your mega-homely-disgusting persona. When your porn tape came out, there was burning, mayhem, and rioting in the streets. Since you hail from Iowa, have you ever considered farm animals? Your dad can buy you a herd to party with.