It’s okay. My dad owns the internet. You owe me a hunderd bucks.
She’ll be out of there in no time. When you’ve got a Friends of Lindsay card, it’s like a lawyer in your pocket.
“Ohmygod, you know Lindsay? Jimmy get these cuffs off, she knows Lindsay. Right this way to the Champagne Room, Ms. Ronson. Now would you prefer your evidence shredded or burnt?”
(Anyone tries to say that’s not how California law enforcement works, I’ll fight them to the death.)
Seriously? He’s almost 18. Isn’t anyone gonna take him to the doctor and find out why he still looks like this?
He is a boy, right? Are we positive?
I like to think they always dress like this. Much more fun.
I don’t even know where the fuck Barbados is to be honest with you.
Miley may say her new tattoo is in support of gay marriage, but I really think she’s just a closet math fanatic.
I thought The Hulk was supposed to be green?
She went shopping. Presumably for some pants.
I bet this is what a Christmas ham dinner on the angels’ dinner table looks like in heaven.
My ears are supposed to be committing suicide, but they’re snoring instead.
What happened to the Rebecca Black who educated us on the days of the week?
Yeah, this one was a real shocker.
Thank God their extremely private secret wedding will air on the not-so-secret and not-so-private cable channel TLC.
Instead of getting her face lifted, she should’ve gotten her brain lifted out of her ass.
Ah, you can tell that Harper Seven has her mommy’s original nose.
Yikes, seven years of marriage to J.Lo. Give this man a medal. I was already sick of her by the seventh image in this gallery.
You know, because in real high school life we all broke out into a Bruno Mars song in the middle of the hallway, the cafeteria served Slurpees, all the dudes were buff as shit and there was a teacher like Sue Sylvester who could be a cunt to a kid’s face without being dragged to jail for acts of child meanery.
Also, in real high school life, some of us actually graduated.
If you want to get Brad and Angelina a gift, the couple is registered in Botswana and the small Cambodian village of Khlong Yai. Girls preferred. No one over 4.
Now post a bunch of photos to prove you have talent!
Lord, let’s hope the kid learns her communication skills from her mother.
