So What Was John Stamos Doing In Those Extortion Photos?
John Stamos is still alive. That’s the good news. The bad news: a couple of knuckleheads tried to extort seven-hundred-G’s from the former Full House TV star, threatening to reveal….party photos!
Just to be clear, when you’re famous and somebody’s asking you for a suitcase full o’ cash to keep party photos from the press, we’re not talking birthday party photos. These aren’t Polaroids of Stamos with chocolate cake around his mouth, trying to pin the tail on a wall-mounted donkey.
So, what exactly might be in the Stamos extortion photos? I have used the power of the scientific method to deduce five potential possibilities for the content of those potential reputation-damaging pics:
1. Grooming his privates — longtime fans of Stamos know full well about his commitment to a natural, Mediterranean male body. Would shots of Stamos shearing his nether-regions damage his rep? Magic 8-Ball and I both say, “It Is Decidedly So”.
2. Forging messages on his own fan sites — haven’t you always wondered if celebs disguise their names and then write great things about themselves on their own fan pages? These photos could’ve blown the socks off the Stamos-fansite-manipulation scandal.
3. Applying a follicle enhancer – the Stamos mane has achieved near religious icon status among the Stamos faithful. Were it revealed that he was somehow artificially rejiggering his God-given locks, just imagine the blockback.
4. Illicit Alpacan relations – remember, these photos were taken in 2004, the height of the Alpaca craze. We all have our thing, for many, this is something warm and fuzzy.
5. Violating his court-imposed ban on singing — many will recall that as part of a legal settlement involving numerous injured parties, Stamos was forbidden to sing in public.
Tell us what you think is in the photos these two Einsteinian extortionists thought would net them $680,000.
Theyre either photos of him:
A) with another guy
B) on drugs
C) nude
D) nude with a guy while on drugs
[quote=Ryan]Theyre either photos of him:
A) with another guy
B) on drugs
C) nude
D) nude with a guy while on drugs[/quote]
or E) Nude, with the Olsen twins.
Fingers crossed.
hahhaha the ‘knuckleheads’ are from my hometown.. and believe me, they deserve the prison time!
The answer is F) NONE OF THE ABOVE…The other girl that is in the pictures was one of my really good friends, she died 3 years ago and it’s a shame that this had to happen, so sorry if I don’t share the same enthusiasm as you do over these pictures.
[quote=Al]The answer is F) NONE OF THE ABOVE…The other girl that is in the pictures was one of my really good friends, she died 3 years ago and it’s a shame that this had to happen, so sorry if I don’t share the same enthusiasm as you do over these pictures.[/quote]
Lol no she’s not. I know her too and she’s still alive. Quit trolling
[quote=Guest]
Lol no she’s not. I know her too and she’s still alive. Quit trolling[/quote]
No the other girl in photo. They named two girls. Of course Allie is still alive. (The girls name was Qynn. I don’t think they named her in any of these stores, but on our local news they did.) Read the post better next time.
alison wishes she were dead… and she was a HUGE bitch btw. She routinely tended the skyboxx bar and was clearly only dating this dude for the things he owned and the money he made… which apparently wasn’t enough… And this Scott guy- he is about 5 feet tall and a total creeper in my opinion. Two morons getting what they might as well have asked for.
[quote=Ryan]Theyre either photos of him:A) with another guyB) on drugsC) nudeD) nude with a guy while on drugs[/quote]