Everyone wants to grow up to be a pop star, right? Or at least, many young girls practiced their Grammy acceptance speeches to their stuffed animals, whether they could sing or not.
When you have enough money, you can at least produce a single — and thanks to the internet, we can look back on those singles forever. So here we have it: a definitive ranking across series and skill level of the Real Housewives’ singing careers.
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Michele Salahi dropped this song before she became a notorious gate-crasher and one-time Real Housewives of D.C. cast member, but much like her antics, this song is just messy — and sounds like something that we would have written as a bop when we were in middle school.
Adriana De Moura
In 2012, the former Real Housewives of Miami star gave us and ode to the South Beach that no one asked for, and the song (and housewife) faded into oblivion as quickly as they came.
She made the line “Who Gonna Check Me, Boo?” infamous, but that’s where it should have stopped. Instead, she decided to see if she could stretch her one iconic phrase into a whole song.
Spoiler alert: she could not.